Fellow young fellow,
Are worldly decisions stressing you out? Need answers to life that involve help without scamming your family this time?
Then you need to welcome Collins Design’s EVERYTHING EXPLAINED THROUGH FLOWCHARTS by Doogie Horner in your confused and needy little heart.
Brainchild of comedian + graphic designer Doogie Horner came up with this hilarious collection of ingenious flowcharts that illuminate all of life’s greatest mysteries, from the best way to win an argument (maybe over oranges, maybe over marriage), to deciding on the perfect tattoo (sexy banana?) or heavy metal band name that fits your personality.
EVERYTHING EXPLAINED THROUGH FLOWCHARTS has already been receiving love, including a full feature in Wired, and a graphic guide to Facebook profiles that Doogie wrote for Fast Company, which, by the way, you should take a look at. Maybe even adjust your FB profile afterwards.
What we love the most about the book, is that it has shiny bits of comedy all over, in charts and in good ol’ words. Our favorites:
P. 34: Which chain restaurant means what to us and what should they be used for.
Example 1: Casual dining → Work → Trying to seduce the hot intern = Rainforest cafe
Example 2: Casual dining → Love → Last date → Last date (violent) = Hooters
P. 40: Comic book sound effects
Example 1: Weapons → Guns → Ricochet → Total miss = PWING
Example 2: Weapons → Energy → Electricity = ZZZZTTTTTT
P 81: Christmas tragedies
Example 1: Left at home while family goes on trip to Paris; forced to fight burglars.
Example 2: Father leaves to buy cigarettes, never returns.
Example 3: You have four different Christmases to go to in one single day!
P 135: 100 minor disappointments.
Example 1: Fortune cookie empty.
Example 6: Long story pointless.
Example 23: Organic food unhealthy.
Example 58: Baby ugly.Example 96: Scrabble triple word score disputed.
And since no book review is done without some kind of experimentation, BBG tried a fabulous flowchart to determine Jocelyn’s mafia name. It was hard to pick one because so many names fit, so we decided to post her trail of results here.
Mafiastic results = “Layers”, “Socks”, “Jocelyn Frosted Flakes”, “The iBarra” and “Lassie Chopin”.
As you can see, we found out that we have as many possible mafia names as we have mysterious personalities.
Now if you don’t order this book immediately, enjoy the pleasure of finding out why the names fit.
Just kidding (?)
EVERYTHING EXPLAINED THROUGH FLOWCHARTS comes out on October 26th and you can buy it here!
See you in a dark spooky alley,
Jocelyn Frosted Flakes